I cannot promise this will make complete sense. There are HUGE thoughts wrapped in these few sentences, so take from it what you will.

Over the years, I’ve come to the realization/belief that things don’t happen TO people, things happen BECAUSE of people. Good times, bad times, etc., are only defined as such by the people who lived them. Basically, an experience is what you make of it. It sounds like an easy concept, and one to which many people subscribe, but yet I still hear people say all the time, “Why is this happening to me?” or “How could that have happened to you?”. It might just be the way we communicate concern or care, but I think it is destructive.

As an extreme example, my father’s passing isn’t something that happened TO me. My father died an unexpected death and I was his daughter. As his daughter, my life was affected greatly. Did it help shape me? Sure. But, I wouldn’t go as far as to say it “changed” my life. How could I possibly know it changed a life I hadn’t lived yet? It WAS and IS my life. It didn’t happen TO me. I am the woman I am today because of the choices (good and bad) that I’ve made in response to that life event.

In essence, I guess I’m saying that we should take responsibility and/or credit for the things that happen in our lives. Again, it is easier said then done, but even though we live in a world where everyone is interconnected, we are all still our own self. And the way one person processes/rationalizes something is unique to that person. So you cannot expect others to process or rationalize things the same way. I’m talking to myself now, you see. :) Although the above thoughts are ones I strongly believe, I also understand they are just the way _I_ have chosen to interpret this life I’m living. So I must also not judge/criticize others who hold different beliefs.